Wedding Wednesdays: Kristen + Charles Thoennes

(Photo courtesy of Kristen Thoennes)

MSAN’s Marketing Manager Kristen Thoennes and her husband Charles chose to celebrate their wedding 15 years ago in the charming town of Mount Pleasant, South Carolina, where they’d had their first date. 


Two years later, Charles joined the Air Force, and Kristen found herself adjusting to a whole new lifestyle. Read how she navigated those first years as a military spouse, the challenges of making new friends, and what she’s learned along the way.

How did you meet? 

We met through Facebook, back when Facebook just started and only for college students. During Christmas break of my freshman year, Charles sent me a friend request the same day a couple other guys sent me one. He was the only one that didn’t have any red flags on his profile, so I accepted. We sent messages back and forth for a couple weeks before deciding to meet for dinner on New Year’s Day. The rest is history!

Did you incorporate any special traditions into your ceremony?

Our guest book was a scrapbook. At the time, [scrapbooking] was one of my biggest hobbies, so we had card stock, pens, and stickers for guests to create their own scrapbook page with messages, drawings, or decorations to make each page unique to our guests.

What is your most cherished wedding memory? 

We took come pictures at a playground that was across from our reception venue. It gave us some really fun, playful pictures to look back on later. There were families playing while we took pictures. One little girl came up with her mom to ask us what we were doing, and it was a sweet moment to share with them.

Was Charles already in the military when you got married, or did that come after?

No, Charles joined the Air Force after we were married almost two years. We celebrated our two year anniversary apart while he was at tech school.

Did you feel prepared for military life when it eventually came?

Growing up, my family moved about every three years so I was used to that. Otherwise, I was not really well-prepared for military life. I remember signing up for Tricare and getting my first dependent ID while he was at tech school being very stressful.

What were those first years like for you as a military spouse?

Part of the reason he joined the AF was because we had been struggling with finding jobs during the recession, so having a steady income from the military was a welcome change.

However, it was very lonely for me. I struggled with meeting "kindred spirits" and knowing how to put myself out there. At the time, we did not have a Key Spouse or anyone at the squadron that was there to support spouses and families.

Without a Key Spouse, how did you find support?

This was my biggest struggle as a new spouse. I was lucky to work at base housing with a wonderful group of people. It was like a family away from home. The job also helped me learn a lot about military life like ranks, different types of jobs and such. At the very end of that assignment, I learned about Key Spouses and spouses' clubs which helped set me up for better success at our second duty station.

What does life look like for you now?

Now we are over the half-way point until military retirement and enjoying the opportunities that come with being stationed in Europe! We have two pets that keep us busy with cuddles. 

We're looking forward to our next PCS where my husband will be an instructor with the opportunity to meet military members from all around Europe and Africa. Despite it being still many years away, we have several ideas for retirement, but cannot quite come to an agreement on what post-military life will look like for us. I would love to open up a B&B and my husband wants to live the rest of his life in Europe. 

Let's take a bet to see what actually happens!

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Stephanie Allen is the Communications & Marketing Director for the Military Spouse Advocacy Network. She is a proud Navy wife and mom, a writer, blogger, success coach, and the Content Manager & columnist for Tidewater Family Plus magazine.