Staying Grounded


Today, take the time to celebrate yourself! Celebrate your love, courage, and sacrifice. Being a new military spouse can be very overwhelming and demanding. Learning the culture of the military and trying to create a shared life with your partner can be very complicated. The following 7 tips can help you increase your happiness and success as a new military spouse:

  1. Love where you are right now. Find the best in every situation. The time you are at a duty station will come and go. You can choose to spend your time being miserable or you can choose to spend your time finding joy in your life. Being a military wife means that you will move a lot. Instead of looking at constant relocation as a huge pain, look at it as an opportunity to grow and stay positive.

  2. Show yourself compassion. Let go of stringent expectations you may have placed on yourself. Give yourself time to grow and learn about your new role.  Being married is hard work. It is even harder when you have not been married long and when there is so much space and time in between you. Don’t give up on yourself or your spouse. You are both still learning.

  3. Get organized. Keep important papers in one place and secure. Learn how to plan for events in advance. Things don’t always go as we plan, but they go a lot worse than expected if we do not have any type of plan or we can’t find important documents when we need them. There are many online resources available for free that can help you with organizing daily projects and special events.

  4. Be flexible and ready to adapt to new circumstances as they arise. Flexibility equals survival as a new military wife. Often new spouses are surprised when homecomings do not turn out the way they planned. Remember, homecomings are rough on you and your spouse. It is okay if things don’t go exactly as you planned. Sometimes, it can be hard to reconnect after a deployment ends.

  5. Develop a deployment plan. Ask yourself what could make deployments easier for you. Would it be easier to learn a new skill, go back to school, volunteer, or go back home while your spouse is deployed for a long period of time?

  6. Know when to ask for help. It can be a struggle being a new military wife, but you do not have to struggle alone. Use the resources that are available to you such as military groups on Facebook, community groups for military wives and other sources. Take time to build a network you can count on for support.

  7. Learn how to communicate. Effective communication is an intricate dance between the listener and the speaker. Learn how to move eloquently in this dance with your partner. The health of your relationship rests on how well you and your partner communicate. Read books to increase your ability to communicate effectively or seek professional help.

Carlie James Petrovics is a freelance writer originally from Georgetown, Delaware.-3.png